Needing Relationship Advice: Should I just End it?

[Fernando Almaguer]

@tropicaldaze1950 Man you hit the nail on the freaking head. About my mental state and hers. She takes zero ownership and I'm stuck trying to figure it out. She makes leaving super difficult. Threatening to hurt herself if I leave yet at the same time ignoring my needs, which if she fulfilled would likely have a very positive effect on the relationship. These aren't demanding requests either, basic shit. Somehow killing herself seems like a better alternative. I know she is full of shit and being dramatic. Its difficult being with someone so dramatic. Well I about 90% over it and I am feeling very empowered by that. Being alone for a bit feels like a very real and pleasant possibility.

sounds like a convert narcissist. I would, yeah, keep talking to other women. Get good at playful banter and dating. Practice makes perfect. I'm in a similar situation and it's crazy making. Best to you my man- we are only getting older !

 

[DixieWrecked]

sounds like a convert narcissist. I would, yeah, keep talking to other women. Get good at playful banter and dating. Practice makes perfect. I'm in a similar situation and it's crazy making. Best to you my man- we are only getting older !

I just looked up covert narcissist and I am 100% percent sure that's her. She even cuts herself. You nailed it! I haven't spoken with her and she sent me a text today telling me how I'm a bad guy. And that I am impossible to satisfy. I didn't even come close to taking the bait. Like I am in a position to prove myself to her. She's got it all backwards. I'm just like, yeah this ***** is a psycho. (pardon my language)

 

[Deleted member 16042]

I just looked up covert narcissist and I am 100% percent sure that's her. She even cuts herself. You nailed it! I haven't spoken with her and she sent me a text today telling me how I'm a bad guy. And that I am impossible to satisfy. I didn't even come close to taking the bait. Like I am in a position to prove myself to her. She's got it all backwards. I'm just like, yeah this ***** is a psycho. (pardon my language)

Good man. Don't rise to that kind of bait. Don't indulge any such attacks attempting to draw you in to co-dependency.

 

[Fernando Almaguer]

I just looked up covert narcissist and I am 100% percent sure that's her. She even cuts herself. You nailed it! I haven't spoken with her and she sent me a text today telling me how I'm a bad guy. And that I am impossible to satisfy. I didn't even come close to taking the bait. Like I am in a position to prove myself to her. She's got it all backwards. I'm just like, yeah this ***** is a psycho. (pardon my language)

Yes, and it should be the other way around for sure! Well, not anymore haha. Also, she could have borderline personality disorder a common co-morbidity with narcs. Stay strong, I am doing my best too.

 

[DixieWrecked]

Best wishes! A day at a time, step by step and ultimately when you look back, you’ll see you made the right decision.

One day at a time is right. I still have days where I miss her and I have stayed strong. She has reached out a few times and I gave her a chance to say what she needed to say and it was clear she is still garbage. I know that withdrawal is just a chemical. When I look back now, it pisses me off that I put u with as much as I did. In the future I am going to be very aware of that and set boundaries sooner.

 

[Lookingforward]

Boundaries are very important. I live by this....."they are all whores until they prove otherwise". I watch everything they do. If it doesn't please me, I get it fixed quick. If they don't bend over backwards to help fix it and make me happy, I move on. There are Givers and Takers. Find an intelligent successful Giver that loves you and you will treat her like a Queen and live happily ever after. This guy will keep you focused....he is one of the best Guy relationship coaches.

 

[Cips1975]

Good move. You deserve to be happy. You knew the answer the whole time it was in you trying to bust out but you kept pushing it back in. You still have a lot of life ahead of you.