SSRI HISTORY 26 YO, HELP

Hi, I am 26 years old guy from Europe.
I failed to regain my true self after Anitdepressants therapy - both emotional and sexual side.
I am now 3 years without taking any AD or psych drug.
Missing my old self desperately. Below are my lab results, more detailed story below them. PLEASE HELP

ESTRADIOL 36,64 pg/ml (n:7,63 – 42,6)
FSH 2,5 mIU/ml (n:1,5 – 12,4)
PROGESTERONE 0,3 ng/ml (n:0,2 – 1,4)
PROLACTIN 9,4 ng/ml (n: 4,0 – 15,2)
TESTOSTERONE 3,21 ng/ml (n: 2,490 – 8,360)
FREE TESTOSTERONE 12,20 pg/ml (n: 4,5 - 42)
SHBG 17,5 nmol/l (n: 17,3 – 65,8)
DHEA 4,013 ng/ml (n: 1,33-7,78)

On the another forum I was advised to make thyroid panel, so I am waiting to do that.

BACKGROUND
I was always super horny since childhood. Anxiety symptoms started since 13 Y/O, never had depression till changing environment to college life (19 Y/O) - doctor prescribed Prozac when I was 21 Y/O - he didn’t mentioned about Sexual Side effects and possible remaining PSSD.
Prozac helped with benzo use ocasionally in stressful situations (once per 1-2 month). I also tried some psychodelics in the meantime with SSRIs (not wise).
After 2 years I felt completely dead dick so I tapered off for 2 weeks and quit.

Then tried to battle depression from diferrent angles – here is my drug history:
Prozac (09.2011-12.2013) - almost 2.5 years
Wellbutrin (01.2014-07.2014)- 6 months
Moclobemid (07.2014) - completely healed PSSD for 2 days, give me terrible nausea, had to quit
Nothing - 2 months/ Depression relapse
Brintellix/Wellbutrin (09.2014 - 04.2015) - almost 1 year of this combo to battle depression without sexual sides with no success
Brintellix (10.2015 – 01.2016) – Last contact with AD
FREE (01.2016 – TODAY)

My sexual dysfunction is not as awful as can be in some people after AD – I am still consider myself a sexual person. However it is like 30% of what it use to be. Main symptoms – premature ejaculation, super weak erections, weak orgasms, weak sensitivity (i can’t feel the tip of my penis). Also almost no sense of connection with other people especially females (no lust/spark). No Chance for long term relationship or normal sex life. My intimate relationships lasts no longer than one night stands. Of course also problems with motivation and focus/memory. Feeling like other person is living in my body. Problem gets better with time for maybe like 5-10% (super super slow),I got one good window of symptoms free (about 60%) for one day, by that was all.

I am desperate to find a relief. My Tesotosterone is super low, so maybe that is a reason? Any feedback, advices, what I can do to help myself? Thanks for creating such a forum. I am tired of waiting, I want to love, have kids, be normal - every piece of advice will be highly appreciated.
 
My heart goes out for you young man and for your conditions. I can relate. I'm 52 and on trt for 12 weeks and still trying to dial it in but I have seen some improvements and have hope. TRT would most likely help many of your symptoms. But you need a doctor that specializes in TRT. I'm going to start using Defy Medical who advertises on this site. I've heard good things about Dr. Saya. Maybe you can ask the guys if they know someone in Europe if you give them your general location. Be patient, it takes a while to dial trt in. Good luck and God speed :)
 

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Understanding Your Hormones

Estradiol (E2)

A form of estrogen produced from testosterone. Important for bone health, mood, and libido. Too high can cause side effects; too low can affect well-being.

DHT

Dihydrotestosterone is a potent androgen derived from testosterone. Affects hair growth, prostate health, and masculinization effects.

Free Testosterone

The biologically active form of testosterone not bound to proteins. Directly available for cellular uptake and biological effects.

Scientific Reference

Lakshman KM, Kaplan B, Travison TG, Basaria S, Knapp PE, Singh AB, LaValley MP, Mazer NA, Bhasin S. The effects of injected testosterone dose and age on the conversion of testosterone to estradiol and dihydrotestosterone in young and older men. J Clin Endocrinol Metab. 2010 Aug;95(8):3955-64.

DOI: 10.1210/jc.2010-0102 | PMID: 20534765 | PMCID: PMC2913038

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