I have lost faith in my Doctor, am I being unreasonable?

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Jaseinatl

New Member
Here are some background facts:

I am 45 years old.
I have been HIV Positive since 1990.
I only started treatment for HIV about 5 years ago.
I was prescribed Adderall and Wellbutrin for 3 years
I regularly have high blood pressure at the beginning of my appointments, but when taken at the end of the appointment by my doctor, it's usually back to normal. (White Coat Syndrome)

When I asked my doctor to test my Testosterone levels, he indicated that it was a crap-shoot. He said that depending on the time of day, what I had eaten, etc., etc. we would get different values and none of them could really be trusted. He admitted that he was not an expert, but agreed to test me.

My results were 370 ng/dl right on the margin between low and normal he said. But still normal. He agreed to try TRT. It changed my life. I quit Adderall and Wellbutrin and my life was better than it had been in 20 years. He even made several comments about how I appeared to be a different person. The change was the most dramatic he had ever seen in a patient.

He originally prescribed:
testosterone enanthate 200 mg/mL injection
Inject 1 ml into the muscle every 14 days

Life was so much better that I didn't notice the peaks and valleys until much later. When I approached my doctor, he claimed I could always go up on my dosage, but didn't do it. As a result, I decided to split my dosage in half and take it every week to avoid the peaks and valleys.

This did not work for me at all. I never received the benefit of increased energy or libido and generally only felt a little bit better than I did on Welbutrin and Adderall.

But then, because of availability, I was switched back and forth between

testosterone enanthate 200 mg/mL injection and
testosterone cypionate 200 mg/mL injection

Inject 0.5 ml (100 mg total) into the muscle every 7 days.

I continued to complain about the low energy levels, but he kept putting me off saying that we would do it next time, he had to look up how much to increase my dosage.

I waited for a year and a half for him to test me again. Finally last January, three days after my .5ml injection, my results came back 74.5 ng/dl. He claimed that it was a different test, but the "normal" range was clearly indicated on the test as 175 - 781.

After that, I went back to every other week and resigned myself to the fact that until he figured out the correct dosage, I would sleep 3 out of 14 days. I didn't get up to eat, only used the restroom a couple of times and slept like a rock for those 3 days. Needless to say, I was non-compliant with my medications.

My partner, on the same treatment plan with another doctor, voluntarily gave up his shot for me and for about 3 months, everything was perfect. I explained this to my doctor, but he just had some crazy plan about having them administer the shot, then precisely 3 days later take the test again and it had to be done on a full moon without eating anything the day before. If the test is that unreliable, it's that unreliable. Come on.

His claim at that point was that he didn't want to increase my dosage since I was at normal levels to start. He claimed it was bad for my heart. I compiled every result from every test in the NIH database and systematically outlined where the tests that he was referencing were done poorly and concerned a disparate demographic: I was not a 70-year-old immobile heart patient taking 4 times the accepted dosage like the one test indicated. I showed him where the FDA had rescinded their claim and agreed that the tests were not done correctly.

I went to his office in June armed to discuss the issue and he tells me the following:
* My CO2 levels were high in my blood. This is not what any test result has ever said in my entire medical history. In fact, it has always been exactly in the middle of the "normal" range. LIE
* My blood-glucose levels were elevated. This is also not true as my blood glucose levels have always been the same and are always closer to the median "normal" level than they are to the "high" level.
* He also said that "Nobody has ever been given more testosterone than I was". Obvious LIE.
* Furthermore, he claimed the it was ludicrous to just increase or decrease dosages based on patient experience and response to prescribed medications. It makes me wonder if he is sane or not. We have regularly adjusted dosages for Adderall, Wellbutrin, Vitamin D, and AmLODIpine, why would testosterone be any different?

He then goes on to say that I am at increased risk for cardiovascular disease and that he is not going to subject me to more testosterone because of the heart risks. But in the same breath he suggests getting back on Adderall? What kind of logic is that?

I have completely lost faith in his ability to provide effective treatment and I feel that he owes me an explanation and an apology for the blatant and documentable lies about my health. I don't understand how he thinks he can make patently false statements about my health without being liable.

And if he was seriously concerned about my underlying cardiovascular health, why hasn't he done anything to monitor it other than to prescribe the minimum dose of amLODIpine (5mg). Which still doesn't change my initial blood pressure results during intake.

I told him that I was going to get Testosterone outside the clinic (did not mention that my partner's doctor would up his dosage, so I would be covered) and asked if he wanted to know how I was treating myself since he couldn't. I agreed to see the endocrinologist but can't get an appointment until November. He didn't even glance at my 100+ pages of documented test cases and dismissed them by saying that for every study that makes any claim about any situation, there are bound to be as many studies saying the opposite.

Regardless of whether it is reasonable for him to suggest alternatives to increasing my dosage, it is not okay to string me along for two years, to lie to me about my health, and to disregard any discussion of it because he has drawn false conclusions that bear no resemblance to what is going on in my case, to make false generalizations about TRT, and most of all to put me on TRT without even monitoring my health after it. Waiting for two years to check my levels after starting TRT is negligent if you ask me.

I know that if I ask for another doctor in the same clinic, they will support his diagnosis and I am not sure how to approach this. I don't trust him and certainly don't feel that he is operating from a clinical decision-making process.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Hopefully this will be more easy to process than the last post I made. Thanks again.
 
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