Porn Induced Erectile Dysfunction - Pied

#3
Only way to test is if you're watching it, stop for a period of time and see what happens.
Other than that, I tend to agree that we invent way too many problems these days.
There's an acronym for every single "problem" so to speak these days.
 
#4
I don't dismiss it as quickly as my friend Vince Carter does, but I don't paint it as the overwhelming, dire challenge many do. A good friend, a clinical psychologist, said the supporting research is all over the map. Many of the studies that argue for such a problem were poorly designed. That said, there are some men in his practice who clearly have issues arising from extensive use of porn.

Open Google and read for yourself...as Sean wrote, you can be a sample of 1.
 
#5
So if I eliminate the porn but continue to masturbate to my own thoughts and fantasies then I would no longer have this made up "PIED" and it would have to be given a new made up name? Or flip it around and refrain totally for, ~14days, and be cured. Sounds totally plausible.
 
#6
Not much on this site here about PIED. I was hoping there was more but it appears that most seem to dismiss it.

I've been unable to get an erection with my wife for a while now. Mid-40's and she has very little interest in sex and nothing else outside of straight sex. So I turned to porn and do end up watching it usually several different times a day. But on the rare occassion that she is interested in getting together, stuff just doesn't work anymore. But erections in the am and other times of the day and of course when watching porn are not a problem. So I'm starting to believe there may be some de-sensitization going on.

Going to try to stop for a while and see if I can fix my problem. I sure hope so cause its frustrating.
 
#7
Not much on this site here about PIED. I was hoping there was more but it appears that most seem to dismiss it.

I've been unable to get an erection with my wife for a while now. Mid-40's and she has very little interest in sex and nothing else outside of straight sex. So I turned to porn and do end up watching it usually several different times a day. But on the rare occassion that she is interested in getting together, stuff just doesn't work anymore. But erections in the am and other times of the day and of course when watching porn are not a problem. So I'm starting to believe there may be some de-sensitization going on.

Going to try to stop for a while and see if I can fix my problem. I sure hope so cause its frustrating.
This usually is 1. You are masturbating to much , this is related to sexual exhaustion. When you orgasm there are floods of hormones, neurotransmitters, even the use of vitamins and minerals. Like anything the body needs to recover from this. 2. You have developed performance anxiety (This is fairly common, sometime Pde5 meds will not help this).
 
#8
This is confrontable thing in a long term relationship, I think that you're on the wrong path of blaming porn or jerking off and not being able to get it up with some one that has seemingly abandoned their role in the physical piece of the relationship (Im just reading between the lines here)
Try to help her...she may be approaching Menopause. May be she's gained weight and thinks youre unhappy with that or her or whatever.
There's certainly a conversation to be had with your partner that is outside of TRT.
 
#11
I was gonna type something similar to what Vince said above. I don't think you are desensitized by the porn from what you've described.....our wives bodies change and their desire for sex fluctuates as they get older. So does ours to be honest. Yall are not synched up and Im willing to bet this is something you can get worked out with her given time and communication.
 
#12
I think it is a big problem for sure.
I've always found it interesting that those who proudly boast how their robust consumption of porn has no bearing on erection quality, are often the same guys who tout an army of supplements and meds (their "stack") that they use to achieve erections.
 
#13
This is confrontable thing in a long term relationship, I think that you're on the wrong path of blaming porn or jerking off and not being able to get it up with some one that has seemingly abandoned their role in the physical piece of the relationship (Im just reading between the lines here)
Try to help her...she may be approaching Menopause. May be she's gained weight and thinks youre unhappy with that or her or whatever.
There's certainly a conversation to be had with your partner that is outside of TRT.
Of course it doesn’t work with your wife. When a guy has to practically beg his wife for sex, it can’t be conducive to a good time. Vince is right in that your wife is not feeling very good about herself, or at least herself as a sexual being. As far as porn being a factor, it’s hard to say. The human sexual response is one of the most natural, and complex, of human experiences and it doesn’t take much to mess it up. Any anxiety or tension is an erection killer. In porn, there is no tension nor chance of rejection and this is a major reason why guys say it “works during porn but not during sex.” As far as the “sensitivity problem” guys refer to, that is also mostly psychological as well. In sex therapy there is a phenomenon called being the “spectator,” where a person views their performance from a third person viewpoint. They are not mindfully participating in the process, become self critical and too analytical, and lose their mojo.

Women, especially wives, are very complicated. Relationships over a period of years go through cycles and sex is a cyclical thing in a long term relationship. Your wife, if not desiring intercourse, should be willing to service you with hand or orally or somehow to keep you satisfied. Neither pArtner should deny the other. If she makes you feel good and you let he know, she can’t help but feel better about herself.

I’m 65 and married 32 years. We have been through these cycles. Sine on TRT the past 3 years, sex has been better that any time in our lives. My wife is down to the same size she was when we married and hasn’t been this fit since the early 90s. I haven’t had this kind of muscularity since my mid 30s. The only sex problems we have, and it is a quality problem, is that I want he daily and she can only handle 3 times per week. I never masturbate, I save that energy for her. I allow her to make me feel horny daily to keep arousal levels for her high, and if it is overwhelming she will accommodate me without intercourse. Sex is a conditioned response and this keeps the response sharp, at least for me.

As far as the comment about guys “having an army of supplements,” absolutely! Guilty as charged. I take a modified version of Gene’s NO stack with the staples being daily Cialis and Flomax, along with citrulline and arginine. When you are in your 60s, I hope that you too will be willing to do whatever it takes to be sexually active. Sex is a part of health and vitality and not merely vanity or hedonism. A marriage of over 30 years can be the best place to get these basic needs met.
 
#14
Your wife, if not desiring intercourse, should be willing to service you with hand or orally or somehow to keep you satisfied. Neither pArtner should deny the other. If she makes you feel good and you let he know, she can’t help but feel better about herself.
See, this is sort of what I thought too. She used to use her hand but its not been in this current house and we've been here 11 years. And oral, well just to say she's really never done that. Not her thing, which is really unfortunate, cause that really bugs me. Its something I think about quite often and become depressed thinking that I'm probably going to die without really ever experiencing that. I didn't have many girlfriends before we married and not sure any girl has done to that to me longer than a couple minutes, and certainly nobody in the last 25 years since we've been together.

The worst part about that is that even if I would bring it up, I knew she doesn't want to do it. So even if she somehow would choose to use her mouth, I'm not even sure it would be enjoyable as I know she doesn't want to do it.

I've asked for a "hand" for the last many years for fathers and birthdays but always come up empty handed.

She doesn't seem to like receiving oral either so maybe just not her thing. I will do it every chance I get but she doesn't like to let it happen too long.

Yes, its very messed up. Put up with it for a long time and she's a good wife and I don't want to get divorced cause I think having a solid family is important for the kids. I just kinda feel really stuck at times.

But back to the subject, I think I'm going to try to lay off the porn and masturbating for a while and see if that can fix the ED thing. It's been 2 days so far so I'm on a roll. ha
 
Last edited:

Dansk

Active Member
#16
Of course it doesn’t work with your wife. When a guy has to practically beg his wife for sex, it can’t be conducive to a good time. Vince is right in that your wife is not feeling very good about herself, or at least herself as a sexual being. As far as porn being a factor, it’s hard to say. The human sexual response is one of the most natural, and complex, of human experiences and it doesn’t take much to mess it up. Any anxiety or tension is an erection killer. In porn, there is no tension nor chance of rejection and this is a major reason why guys say it “works during porn but not during sex.” As far as the “sensitivity problem” guys refer to, that is also mostly psychological as well. In sex therapy there is a phenomenon called being the “spectator,” where a person views their performance from a third person viewpoint. They are not mindfully participating in the process, become self critical and too analytical, and lose their mojo.

Women, especially wives, are very complicated. Relationships over a period of years go through cycles and sex is a cyclical thing in a long term relationship. Your wife, if not desiring intercourse, should be willing to service you with hand or orally or somehow to keep you satisfied. Neither pArtner should deny the other. If she makes you feel good and you let he know, she can’t help but feel better about herself.

I’m 65 and married 32 years. We have been through these cycles. Sine on TRT the past 3 years, sex has been better that any time in our lives. My wife is down to the same size she was when we married and hasn’t been this fit since the early 90s. I haven’t had this kind of muscularity since my mid 30s. The only sex problems we have, and it is a quality problem, is that I want he daily and she can only handle 3 times per week. I never masturbate, I save that energy for her. I allow her to make me feel horny daily to keep arousal levels for her high, and if it is overwhelming she will accommodate me without intercourse. Sex is a conditioned response and this keeps the response sharp, at least for me.

As far as the comment about guys “having an army of supplements,” absolutely! Guilty as charged. I take a modified version of Gene’s NO stack with the staples being daily Cialis and Flomax, along with citrulline and arginine. When you are in your 60s, I hope that you too will be willing to do whatever it takes to be sexually active. Sex is a part of health and vitality and not merely vanity or hedonism. A marriage of over 30 years can be the best place to get these basic needs met.
This is very well said, you are clearly a wise older man who is in a healthy relationship. Its also clear the OP has more issues than porn.
 
#17
See, this is sort of what I thought too. She used to use her hand but its not been in this current house and we've been here 11 years. And oral, well just to say she's really never done that. Not her thing, which is really unfortunate, cause that really bugs me. Its something I think about quite often and become depressed thinking that I'm probably going to die without really ever experiencing that. I didn't have many girlfriends before we married and not sure any girl has done to that to me longer than a couple minutes, and certainly nobody in the last 25 years since we've been together.

The worst part about that is that even if I would bring it up, I knew she doesn't want to do it. So even if she somehow would choose to use her mouth, I'm not even sure it would be enjoyable as I know she doesn't want to do it.

I've asked for a "hand" for the last many years for fathers and birthdays but always come up empty handed.

She doesn't seem to like receiving oral either so maybe just not her thing. I will do it every chance I get but she doesn't like to let it happen too long.

Yes, its very messed up. Put up with it for a long time and she's a good wife and I don't want to get divorced cause I think having a solid family is important for the kids. I just kinda feel really stuck at times.

But back to the subject, I think I'm going to try to lay off the porn and masturbating for a while and see if that can fix the ED thing. It's been 2 days so far so I'm on a roll. ha
Upon receipt of this info, disregard my previous pep talk......I'm out of any further helpful ideas.....
 
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